For the past year, we have been walking through the book of Romans, and now we are in the home stretch. The book of Romans is Paul’s letter to the church in Rome, written as he prepared for a visit and hoped to continue his journey to Spain. In this letter, Paul lays out his theology and explains the gospel, focusing on doctrine in the first 11 chapters. These early chapters are all about understanding who God is and developing right thinking about Him. However, beginning in chapter 12, there is a shift — Paul transitions from what believers should know to how they should live out that knowledge.
The remaining chapters focus on how our understanding of God should transform the way we live, particularly in the context of love. Love is the underlying theme driving how we live as followers of Christ. In chapter 12, Paul calls believers to let their love be genuine, and later in chapter 13, he emphasizes that we should owe nothing to anyone except love. As we move into Romans 14:13-23, Paul dives deeper into how believers should demonstrate love toward one another, especially when it comes to secondary issues — matters that are not essential to the Christian faith but can often cause division.
In this part of the letter, Paul is addressing how believers should walk in love within the church, particularly when dealing with preferences and opinions. These are not foundational beliefs that define Christian faith, such as the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus. Rather, they are personal preferences and convictions — issues where there is freedom in Christ. The question Paul raises is how we, as mature believers, can navigate this freedom in a way that builds others up rather than causing them to stumble.
Don’t Cause Another to Stumble
Paul gives us a clear command in Romans 14:13: “Never put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother.” This principle is foundational to how we navigate our Christian freedom. While we may have the freedom to engage in certain activities, we must always be mindful of how our actions impact others, especially fellow believers who may be younger in the faith or more sensitive to certain practices.
In this passage, Paul specifically addresses the “stronger” believers — those who understand that they have the freedom in Christ to do certain things that are not inherently sinful. However, he emphasizes that this freedom should never be used in a way that causes a brother or sister to stumble or struggle in their faith. If our freedom causes harm, it is no longer rooted in love, which brings us to Paul’s first parameter for how we exercise our freedom.
1. Be Motivated by Love and Model the Life of Jesus
Paul explains that our freedom should always be motivated by love and modeled after the life of Jesus. In Romans 14:15, he says, “For if your brother is grieved by what you eat, you are no longer walking in love.” This means that if something we do causes emotional or spiritual distress to a fellow believer, we are not acting out of love. As followers of Christ, love should be our driving force in every action we take, especially when it comes to how we exercise our freedom.
Jesus set the ultimate example of love, showing that true love sacrifices for the good of others. In John 13:35, Jesus tells His disciples that the world will know they are His followers by the way they love one another. Love does not seek to harm; it seeks to protect, encourage, and nurture. Just as we would never intentionally harm those we love, we must be careful not to harm our brothers and sisters in Christ by insisting on our personal freedoms.
Paul uses strong language to illustrate this point. In verse 15, he warns believers not to “destroy the one for whom Christ died.” He reiterates this in verse 20, saying, “Do not for the sake of food destroy the work of God.” While we may have the freedom to do certain things, we must never let our freedom tear down the spiritual growth and work that God is doing in someone’s life.
Paul’s point is simple: if Jesus, who had every right and power, chose to lay down His life for us, we can certainly lay aside our personal preferences for the sake of a fellow believer. Love compels us to consider how our actions might affect others, and just as Jesus set aside His rights for our good, we too can set aside our freedoms to help others grow in their faith.
2. Pursue Kingdom Life of Peace and Encouragement
The second principle Paul gives for exercising our Christian freedom is this: we must pursue a life shaped by the values of God’s kingdom — righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit. In Romans 14:17, Paul emphasizes that “the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking but of righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit.” This means that our focus as believers should not be on external matters like personal preferences but on cultivating eternal values that reflect the character of God.
When we prioritize righteousness, peace, and joy, it becomes easier to set aside our rights and preferences for the good of others. Kingdom living transforms us, giving us the ability to joyfully lay down our freedoms to encourage and build up those around us. One mark of spiritual maturity is a shift in perspective — from asking “What can I do?” to asking “How can I build others up?”
Paul makes it clear that we are to pursue what leads to peace and mutual upbuilding (Romans 14:19). This means making a conscious effort to strengthen and encourage fellow believers, rather than creating division over personal preferences. Whether it is the issue of eating certain foods, wearing masks, or other non-essential matters, our priority should be the well-being of others in the body of Christ.
In a culture where disagreement often leads to division, the church has a unique opportunity to show the world what it means to disagree yet still love one another deeply. When we live out kingdom values of peace, righteousness, and joy, we demonstrate the transformative power of the gospel. We become a light in a divided world, showing that true unity is possible when Christ is at the center. The world may not always understand or appreciate this way of living, but as Jesus said in Matthew 5:16, “Let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.”
3. Encourage Obedience With a Clear Conscience
The final principle Paul gives regarding our Christian freedom is that we should encourage obedience with a clear conscience. He speaks directly to the stronger, more mature believers, reminding them to be mindful of how they handle their freedom. In Romans 14:22, Paul says, “The faith that you have, keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the one who has no reason to pass judgment on himself for what he approves.”
Paul is not telling believers to keep their faith secret or hidden. He is encouraging those who are more confident in their freedom to enjoy it with a clear conscience, but without flaunting it or pushing it on others. In matters of personal preference, such as food or drink, it is important to walk in freedom while remaining sensitive to those who may struggle with certain issues. If your conscience is clear, praise God — but there is no need to flaunt your freedom or be prideful about it.
For the weaker brother or sister, Paul offers a critical piece of advice: “Whoever has doubts is condemned if he eats, because the eating is not from faith. For whatever does not proceed from faith is sin” (Romans 14:23). This means that if a believer engages in something they believe to be wrong, even if it is a matter of preference, they are sinning because their actions go against their conscience. Acting in opposition to one’s convictions leads to sin, even if the activity itself is not inherently sinful.
For example, imagine a young believer who grew up in a home where alcohol was abused. For them, alcohol is closely associated with sin and harm. If they visit the home of a more mature believer and are offered a glass of wine, they might feel internal pressure to conform, even though they believe drinking alcohol is wrong. If they go against their conviction and drink the wine, they are sinning, not because drinking is inherently sinful, but because they acted against their conscience.
On the other hand, the stronger believer should never coerce or pressure the weaker believer into doing something that violates their conscience. If the more mature Christian knows about the younger believer’s struggles with alcohol, it would be loving and Christlike to forgo offering them wine or even consuming it in their presence. Paul’s warning is clear: never force or encourage a weaker brother or sister to do something they believe is wrong. Ultimately, this teaches them to ignore the Spirit’s guidance in their lives.
Paul’s message to the church is this: our preferences and freedoms are not primary. What is primary is living a life shaped by love, peace, and righteousness. True freedom in Christ does not mean demanding our rights but willingly laying them down to build up our brothers and sisters. As we do this, we model the life of Jesus, who laid down His life for our sake, and we encourage others to walk in obedience with a clear conscience. The call is to keep the main thing the main thing — focus on loving one another, pursuing peace, and building up the body of Christ.
