From Romans 12 onward, Paul emphasizes the importance of love within the community of faith — urging us to outdo one another in showing honor. This sets a high bar, especially on days when we are not at our best. We have all had moments that test our patience and grace, where a single difficult interaction colors our perception of someone. In these moments, the true challenge of Christian love becomes evident.
For instance, I recall a personal struggle around 2020 or 2021. Our church was looking for a new lead pastor and we were faced with decisions about our church’s direction during an extremely difficult time for the whole world. During a particularly stressful period, I found myself overly fixated on a secondary, non-essential issue. Looking back, I can not even remember what the issue was, but the kindness Bill and Rick showed me when I voiced my concerns to them left a lasting impression. They exemplified true pastoral care — listening, empathizing, and reminding me that we were all working together, striving to discern and follow God’s direction.
This experience mirrors the broader theme Paul addresses in Romans 14:1-12 — how we should respond when opinions and minor disagreements threaten to disrupt our unity. As we dive into the specifics of this chapter, we will explore how Paul instructs us to manage personal convictions and the disputes that arise from them, emphasizing that love must prevail over individual judgments.
1. Extend Welcome Without Reservation
In his letter to the Romans, Paul addresses a crucial aspect of Christian living: extending welcome without reservation. This message is not just a casual suggestion but a foundational principle of faith, emphasized through Paul’s reflections on the diverse cultural backgrounds converging within the early church. The Roman congregation, a melting pot of Jewish and Gentile believers, faced tensions due to differing religious practices and cultural norms. Some Jewish followers clung to dietary laws and special feast days, claiming that these practices were essential for Christians. This imposition created friction, highlighting varying levels of spiritual maturity within the community.
Paul calls for mature believers to lead by example, advocating for us to prioritize unity over uniformity. Instead of engaging in fruitless debates over non-essential issues, Paul urges the church in Rome to focus on what truly matters. He emphasizes that many disputes among believers are over secondary issues that should be approached with grace.
Paul’s message revolves around the notion of ‘welcome.’ This is not merely a polite greeting or superficial niceness, but a deep, sacrificial love that mirrors God’s acceptance of us. Paul distinguishes between the everyday pleasantries of greeting and the profound act of welcoming. To welcome someone means to “bring someone under your wing.” It is an ongoing commitment, requiring believers to continually extend grace and hospitality, even at a personal cost.
Paul uses a powerful analogy to explain this concept. He describes how God welcomed us: not by endorsing our shortcomings, but by making the ultimate sacrifice — sending His Son to bridge the gap between humanity and God. This act turned enemies into a family. Similarly, believers are called to lay aside their rights and preferences, to embrace those who may seem weaker or less mature in faith. By doing so, they reflect God’s unconditional love and acceptance.
Our world can appear more diverse and divided than ever, but this passage challenges us to look beyond our differences and to see the value in every believer. Whether dealing with debates about doctrinal nuances or everyday disagreements, the call to extend welcome without reservation remains a radical but essential standard for all who follow Christ.
2. Keep Preferences in Their Place
Our spiritual maturity is not demonstrated by how forcefully we can argue or impose our preferences, but by how gracefully we keep them in their rightful place. In Romans 14, Paul challenges the more mature believers not to use their spiritual maturity as a means to enforce conformity among the less mature. Instead, he invites them to lead by embracing diversity when it comes to convictions on non-essential matters. The focus should not be on winning arguments or changing others to fit our mold but on demonstrating the kind of unconditional love and acceptance that Christ showed us.
Paul instructs us to welcome those who are weak in faith without trying to change them. This is not about passive acceptance but active engagement without the underlying motive of changing the person. By doing this, we avoid the trap of playing Holy Spirit, a role strictly reserved for God Himself, whose job is to transform hearts and minds in His timing and manner.
At Coggin, we have a practical framework for handling disagreements within the Christian community. We categorize convictions into four levels:
- Die for: Essential beliefs that form the core of Christian faith.
- Divide for: Important but not salvation-related beliefs that may shape community practices.
- Debate: Opinions that deserve discussion but are open to differing views.
- Discuss: Matters of personal preference that should not cause division.
By understanding which category our convictions fall into, we can navigate interactions with grace and wisdom. For instance, essential doctrines like salvation through faith in Christ alone or core ethical teachings are non-negotiable. However, many issues that often cause division, such as styles of worship, dietary habits, or even political opinions, fall into the ‘debate’ or ‘discuss’ categories. Here, Paul urges believers to hold their convictions with humility.
This structured approach helps believers discern when to assert their beliefs and when to yield for the sake of unity and love. It encourages us to ask ourselves whether our priority is to prove someone wrong or to love them well. This decision reflects not only our spiritual maturity but also our understanding of the Gospel’s core message.
The statement, “In essentials, unity; in non-essentials, liberty; in all things, charity,” is a call to prioritize love over legalism, unity over uniformity, and grace over dogmatism. It challenges us to lead with love, recognizing that this approach is not only transformative but also reflective of the heart of Christ. Keeping our preferences in their place is not about diluting our convictions but about contextualizing them within the broader framework of Christian love and unity. It is a call to practice humility, to cherish diversity within the body of Christ, and to allow the Holy Spirit to work in ways that transcend our human tendencies.
3. Let God Be the Judge
Paul makes it clear in Romans 14 that judgment belongs to God alone, especially in disputes that do not hinge on core doctrinal issues. Paul emphasizes that Christ alone is Lord — over both the living and the dead — because He has died for our sins and risen to claim that authority. This serves as a reminder that none of us has the standing to judge others, particularly in areas where opinions may vary. Paul points out that unless we have sacrificed ourselves for someone’s sins, as Christ did, we have no basis to assume the role of judge over their convictions and choices.
This principle is especially relevant in handling disagreements over secondary issues, which Paul insists should not be the grounds for judgment or division within the church. Believers must recognize that each person’s convictions are shaped by a multitude of factors, like upbringing, influences, and personal experiences. Recognizing this should breed patience and empathy rather than judgment.
Paul also warns against the spiritual danger of allowing judgment to replace understanding. He points out that quick judgments can easily undermine the Christian witness, turning debates over minor matters like schooling choices or political affiliations into sources of division. Instead, he urges the church to focus on fostering a community characterized by love and unity. This approach strengthens the internal bonds of the community and enhances its testimony to the outside world.
Paul envisions a church where diverse opinions coexist with a shared commitment to the Gospel, exemplifying how to live “on Earth as it is in heaven.” In practical terms, Paul urges believers to:
- Commit to the Essentials: Understand and hold fast to the core doctrines of the faith.
- Prioritize Gospel Unity: In all interactions, choose unity in the Gospel over personal opinions, echoing Christ’s own sacrifice and humility.
- Keep Your Eyes on the Throne: Constantly focus on Jesus, allowing His life and teachings to guide responses to every situation, ensuring that secondary issues remain secondary.
By following these principles, believers can foster a community that navigates internal differences with grace and stands as a testament to the transformative power of the Gospel in a divided world. This commitment to refrain from judgment and embracing love is what Paul identifies as the key to truly living out the Gospel in every aspect of life.
