It is no surprise that discussing human sexuality in the church can evoke a mix of emotions — from discomfort to curiosity. Historically, these conversations are either skirted around or handled with such trepidation that the beauty and truth within them lose their brilliance. Yet, ignoring this topic does a disservice not only to the truth of Scripture but to the flourishing of God’s people. Addressing sexuality openly, with the reverence and seriousness it deserves, allows us to explore not a cultural or reactionary doctrine, but a divine design. As we dive into Genesis chapters 1 and 2, and 1 Corinthians 7, our study will take us from the foundations of creation to the heart of the New Testament, uncovering God’s blueprint for this integral aspect of human connection.
The fears around discussing sexuality are not unsupported. The concern that delving too deeply might turn this sacred gift into an idol is a valid caution. However, God did not create anything inherently evil; all creation was pronounced “good” by Him who made it. Therefore, the answer to misuse or misunderstanding is not neglect or distortion but a return to the original plan laid out in Scripture. Human sexuality was crafted by God as a crucial part of the very good creation narrative described in Genesis. It is intended for enjoyment within the sacred bounds of marriage, reflecting the union between Christ and the Church. This divine perspective is not meant to stir shame or to be perceived as a “yucky” topic. Instead, it should be celebrated and respected as a vital aspect of marital love and spiritual symbolism.
Misunderstandings about sexuality lead to its misuse. When we fail to teach about the beauty and purpose of sexuality, we leave a void that society fills with its own distorted views. Addressing this topic in the church is not about promoting promiscuity or reducing the sacredness of sexual union, but about fostering a healthy, biblical understanding that enhances marriage and glorifies God. The church must embrace and teach God’s intentions for sexuality. This will not only counter the cultural corruption of this divine gift but also reinforce the sanctity of marriage as a covenant that mirrors Christ’s faithful love for His bride, the Church.
So, as we prepare to delve deeper into the practical applications and spiritual significances of sexuality, let us hold fast to the truth that this is not merely a physical act, but a profound expression of love, commitment, and divine intention.
1. Sex Is God’s Design… Celebrate It, Don’t Corrupt It
In Scripture, we find that sex is a divine ordinance, crafted by God with a profound sense of purpose and intentionality. Genesis displays the clear blueprint of human sexuality designed by God Himself. This is not a product of human invention or societal evolution; it is the craftsmanship of the Creator, marking sexuality as inherently good and purposeful. From the beginning, the creation narrative in Genesis establishes sexuality as an integral aspect of human existence. God created humans male and female, His design for sexual identity and function. This design is not a cultural construct but a divine command, infused with purpose and wrapped in the sanctity of His perfect plan.
God’s command to “be fruitful and multiply” is not merely a directive for reproduction but a celebration of sexual union within the marital covenant. This command underscores sex as a good creation, designed for procreation, bonding, and mutual joy of husband and wife. It is not a sin-tainted afterthought but a core component of God’s plan for humanity.
The contemporary discourse often distorts or oversimplifies the narrative around sexuality, reducing it to mere pleasure or a means of self-expression. However, true liberation in sexual expression is found within the boundaries God has set. Celebrating sexuality means embracing it as God intended — in the covenantal union of marriage. Within this safe and sacred space, sex is not only an act of love but a profound communion that mirrors the relational depth intended by God.
Sexual intimacy, as outlined in Scripture, transcends the physical — it is a unifying act that fosters emotional, spiritual, and physical oneness. Genesis speaks of a man and woman leaving their families to cleave to one another, emphasizing the integral role of sex in fostering this profound union. This ‘one flesh’ union encompasses all dimensions of intimacy, illustrating that sex within marriage is not merely permissible but is purposed for deepening relational intimacy and mutual fulfillment.
It is crucial to recognize that intimacy is not solely about sexual encounters. Non-sexual affection — such as holding hands, hugging, and other gentle expressions of love — plays a vital role in strengthening a marriage. These acts of affection are foundational throughout the entirety of marriage, maintaining warmth and closeness even when sexual intimacy might not be possible due to various life stages or health issues.
In a world that either idolizes sex or shrouds it in shame, returning to the biblical view of sexuality is revolutionary. It allows us to celebrate this divine gift without corruption, understanding its place within the holistic design of human relationships. As we navigate through the complexities of modern attitudes and pressures surrounding sex, let us anchor our understanding in the truth that God created it good, and within His design. It is something to be cherished, respected, and enjoyed in the fullness of marital love. By embracing this divine blueprint, we not only honor God but also experience the richness of life He intended through the gift of sexuality.
2. Strive to Make Sex a Regular and Often Occurrence in Your Marriage (1 Corinthians 7:1-6)
The Bible places profound emphasis on the importance of regular and joyful sexual intimacy within marriage. This is not just a suggestion from the Apostle Paul but a divine command that helps foster connection and unity within the marriage. Making sex a regular and often occurrence in your marriage is not just beneficial — it is biblical. Paul’s instructions in 1 Corinthians 7 make it clear that sexual relations in marriage are not to be sporadic or reluctant but regular and mutual. This regularity is not about mere physical pleasure; it is about reinforcing the emotional and spiritual bonds that hold a marriage together. When Paul speaks of fulfilling one’s marital duties, he stresses a mutual service that is joyous and loving, not a chore or an obligation.
One of the most radical yet beautiful aspects of biblical marriage is the idea that your body does not belong solely to you but also to your spouse. This mutual ownership is rooted not in control or demand but in the commitment to mutually serve and cherish each other. It is about offering oneself fully and joyfully, ensuring that both partners’ needs for intimacy and affection are met.
While abstinence within marriage is sometimes necessary, Paul advises that it be temporary and for specific purposes such as dedicated prayer. This abstention should be mutual, consensual, and designed to enrich the spiritual connection. Once the purpose is fulfilled, couples are encouraged to resume their physical intimacy, thereby safeguarding their marriage against temptations due to unmet sexual needs.
However, it is not uncommon for couples to encounter sexual challenges, whether from past experiences, present insecurities, or physiological issues. Addressing these challenges through open communication, counseling, and mutual understanding is crucial. For those struggling with intimacy, seeking professional help can provide tools and insights to navigate this delicate area of marriage life.
Practical Steps Toward Improvement
Communicate Openly: Regularly discuss your needs and desires openly and sensitively with your spouse.
Seek Professional Help: Do not hesitate to seek counseling if past trauma or current difficulties are affecting your intimacy.
Educate Yourself: Utilize resources like books, podcasts, and seminars to better understand and improve your sexual relationship within marriage.
Making sex a regular and cherished part of your marriage is about much more than physical satisfaction. It is about celebrating the gift of marriage as God intended, fostering a deep, lasting bond that reflects the love of Christ. As you strive to enhance this aspect of your marriage, remember it is a journey of mutual growth, love, and respect, culminating in a stronger, more resilient union.
